I’m at my wits end.
I am a stay at home mom, though I have been the bread winner as well. Through both experiences, my husband shows me little to no respect for the things I do for him, our family and the kids.
From demanding I make his lunch, ready his clothes and maintain an immaculate house, homeschool the children and ‘watch my appearance’. I just feel like I deserve more than a single night out once every six months, one that he controls I might add.
I know now that I married a control freak and manipulator but I can’t bring myself not to love him still for all the great qualities. He stands by me and defends me from my horrible in laws, he is the perfect father for our children, one I am so thankful for, and always willing to work out our differences as far as how to parent and such.
I just can’t seem to get him to admit his issues, whatever it is that keeps him from healing and being more supportive as a husband and partner. He doesn’t see that putting me down, when I am beyond tired and not able to keep up with my usual tasks is not okay. He thinks its how I work because it’s what gets me up and doing it.
He doesn’t see that I can’t force our kids to understand something, that homeschooling is hard as hell, especially with multiple children and I am not some wonder woman who can just make everything make sense for our kids and then bam, they learn it.
I don’t think divorce is the answer for us, we have made it through much harder situtaions and come out stronger for it, but in 12 years I have yet to figure out how to get past these issues.